Party aftermath is always fun. Small details of conversations & happenings trickling back into memory, finding out who was hung over (no one!), etc. Terra's not letting the kiss with Steven go, though I expected no less of her. Steven & Stephanie personally agreed to never talk about it, which I also expected. Uncle Richard seems to have no idea the toilet overflowed massively, & Meri's pictures have yet to hit Facebook, & there are some gems. And Stephanie says she "remembers it all too well."

Mother & I did a little shopping yesterday. She's apparently done with me & Brandon, although it sounds like she almost expects to buy more for us. I think she tends to spoil us at Christmas. Santa's been out of the picture for years & we still get a shit ton of presents. My dad is apparently not included in shopping ventures, because I hear the only thing he's really good for is carrying bags.

I did get myself a nice scarf & pair of gloves, which I needed bad, & a new bra from Victoria's Secret, which was on sale & is so far proving to be wonderful. I got a little coat that I didn't need, too, but was still adorable & on sale. We got a little Christmas shopping done, but we're a bit stuck with my cousin Sophie. And from several ventures into Claire's & Limited Too, I've come to the conclusion that I just do not understand pre-teen girls. I was one not too particularly long ago, & I don't understand them. Plus it's a really hard age to buy for. To me, eleven is too young to be wearing make-up. If anything, I was only wearing lip gloss & maybe eye shadow then. So that idea's out. And jewelry depends a lot on the girl's preferences.

Nolan's a bit tough to buy for, too, though Mother joked about buying him a bottle of some sort of liquor. It's not like it wouldn't be appreciated or put to use, so it's not a bad idea.

Meanwhile, Sarah's absence has been adequately explained, though there's still minor talks of a mini-intervention. Just telling her we feel like Nicole's being put before us all the time. We get spending time with a significant other is really important & it's been hard for her, but if she'd come out with us we could cheer her up & listen to her vent. Plus at this point she sees Nicole far more than she knows. Her own sister is trying to get her to spend more time with us. And Meri & AJ as a couple haven't ever come between any of us. It's a complicated situation, but Marion's right - if it were one of us leaving her out, she'd be really upset.

10 songs that sum up your weekend...or were on your weekend playlist...and one picture that relates back. (oh, and if you feel like it, tell us why you picked the songs you did)

1. "Message in a Bottle" by The Police for Rock Band.
2. "You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth (Hot Summer Night)" by Meat Loaf, for talking about Rocky Horror & Meat Loaf with Steph's brother Steven. And because he kissed me, which isn't as romantic as that sounds at all.
3. "Antmusic" by Adam & the Ants, because we made our Rock Band characters all dress the way he does, & I expressed a desire to want to be the female version of him.
4. "Leave the Bourbon on the Shelf" by The Killers. We didn't have any bourbon, but you know.
5. "I Don't Like Mondays" by the Boomtown Rats yet again, because break ended too soon.
6. "Again and Again" by Keane, although I didn't drunkenly ramble about how much I love them this time.
7. "Sweet Emotions" by Aerosmith
8. "Rock & Roll Hoochie Koo" by Rick Derringer
9. "Let Me Kiss You" by Morrissey
10. "Lord Have Mercy on My Soul" by Black Oak Arkansas

We went drinking after all. Talked my mother into letting me go & come home early in the morning, which ended up working out surprisingly well, given I was awake & couldn't fall back asleep.

We played some Rock Band at my house first, then made our way over to Nolan's. Adam was having a party with his friends in the Shed, but somehow agreed to have a joint party. So it was our usual crowd, a few guests, & a few former classmates that have, apparently, partied there before.

It went surprisingly well. Nolan made awesome margaritas, & Steph's brother Steven was one of the first to show up & took up his teasing of me that he's been doing since I met Steph in middle school - asking me out, asking when I'll be his girlfriend, etc. All in good fun.

Mostly, we all just hung out & talked. Nolan & I got a bit drunk, & with the exception of Steven, may have been the true drunkards of the evening, though no one got sick. I felt quite good, actually. We were having a good time, just generally bullshitting. AJ & Meri had fun teasing each other, & as a group we had fun telling people AJ has slept with both of us & letting them get the total wrong idea before correcting them, saying that we've only all three shared a bed.

Steph made an appearance & stayed over, as did AJ. Marion's friend Dave that we met over the summer the day after the Breaking Dawn released at Unleash the Beast came, too, & friends of Adam's - some I knew from high school, but later a lot I didn't.

Early on, it was decided AJ needed a hair cut, so Adam's friend Nick shaved his head. Later, Adam's friend Scott hit a deer on his way home. I don't know the details of how the following happened, but here's the basics: one of the other guys, who are all hunters, shot the deer after it had been hit, loaded it in the back of their truck, & brought it back to the Shed to be skinned. They had it laying out in the yard & some of the guys took a picture with it, when Nick had everybody get behind it & take a big group picture. It's pretty ridiculous, but hilarious. They brought it in & skinned it, right in the middle of a party, so I decided that if I was going to, as a vegetarian, be in the same room with a deer being gutted, I needed another drink.

Meanwhile, Steven was getting increasingly more drunk & teasing, & would put his arm around me & call me his girlfriend or tell people that he's been asking me out since I was in 8th grade, which is basically true. In the midst of this, we girls had decided that Steve is indeed quite cute, so somehow the translated to "Janelle, ask him to make out with you!", most likely because I'm single, I was the most drunk, & I'm little. I objected, but they asked Steven themselves. After lots of hugging, he eventually just came at me & made out with me, while nearly the entire room cheered except for Adam, who I'm told didn't seem pleased, & Stephanie, who was downright mortified & furious at him. I knew she would be & immediately felt bad, though I have to admit, it was funny & good & makes for a pretty good story.

From then on, things mostly started to wind down. There was a lot of chat in between & the toilet inside completely overflowed at some point, & Stephanie got a bit drunk & went to bed with Nolan while me, Meri, Marion, & AJ talked about the fact that Sarah completely blew us off, which has since been explained, & other happenings & I sobered up pretty quickly. Marion joined Steph & Nolan, & Meri, AJ, & I took to her room again, though with him on the floor & us girls in the bed. I got up around 8 & peaced out & went to church, feeling fine, just parched. Not even tired.

I'd definitely rank it in my top five parties/drunken nights.

Thanksgiving break is such a tease. You're handed a few days of partial rest & relaxation, a reminder of what life on Christmas break is like, but there's still work to be done. Still homework, papers, & finals to prepare for. I have homework due Monday, a paper due Tuesday, & a paper due Wednesday, then finals week. At least I've started all of them. I haven't made a particularly large amount of progress, but it's a start. And I started at the beginning of break, too, as opposed to within the last few hours.

Break's been pretty uneventful, but I kind of like it that way, especially with said homework. Christmas break will be better for partying.

We were going to go out drinking again tonight, but I'm still relying on Mother's car & she's getting angry about me having missed church two weeks in a row already, so instead everyone's coming over here & we're playing Rock Band. It's strange. Grandma's birthday is Monday, I'll grant her that, but there was a point where I hadn't been to church in about a month for one reason or another & she never said a word, but when I asked to go celebrate Nolan's birthday last week she complained then, as I'd missed church the week before, too. I never know when she's going to care & when she isn't, & when she does care it's not because of the alcohol. There's no clear pattern as to when she gets mad as opposed to when she doesn't. Maybe she thinks that if she keeps forcing me to go, I'll be more likely to keep going when I'm on my own. But really, it'll make no difference. Besides, while I go to church physically I'm very rarely in church mentally, so it makes no difference. The only reason I don't put up more of a fight is partially because I know how far I can push her, & partially because her enforcing rules while I still live under her roof & she pays for my education is, for the most part, fair.

Although if/when I get my own car, no way do I think I should have a curfew imposed on me.

Top 5 musical things on your Christmas Wish List.

My Christmas list actually included a good amount of CDs, but for the sake of variety & making a definitive list of things I still want, here are five new ones!

1. Tonight by David Bowie
2. The Cure's greatest hits acoustic
3. Day & Age by The Killers
4. The Grand Illusion by Styx
5. Black Holes & Revelations by Muse

1. What’s a profession you believe to be overpaid? Some actors are really overpaid. I realize movies are expensive, but is that necessary?

2. Who’s a musician you believe to be overrated? Nickelback. Their songs all sounds the same! There's no variety! How is this appealing!? Same with Linkin Park. Bobby wants their song that's on the Twilight soundtrack. I don't have that song, & if I did, I wouldn't send it to him anyway.

3. What in your life could stand to be overhauled? My work ethic. Or lack thereof. Hence the need of an overhaul. My finances, or lack thereof, as well.

4. What’s something interesting you recently overheard? I don't overhear things. I straight up eavesdrop, & I admit it. I can't remember the most recent interesting bit of information I got, though. My dad was bitching at my mom for moving his stuff, but she had every right because he treats the dining room like a fucking closet.

5. Who is the most overextended person you know? Probably Mother. Don't tell her I said that, she'd use it against me.

I'm going to fuck my sleeping habits up so horribly just over five days. I can tell. Already I've slept till early afternoon & been up until the wee hours of the morning. I'm hoping that being up earlier today will consequently make me go to bed earlier, & keep me in some sort of regular sleeping pattern. Going back to school & having a horrible time of dragging myself out of bed at 9:30 would be the worst, even if it is the last week of classes.

Thanksgiving's been pretty lazy, which is as it should be. Aside from eating & playing Call of Duty for a bit, all I've essentially been doing is watching House. USA & their marathons will be the death of me! In an attempt to salvage at least some of the day, partially to make myself feel a bit less lazy, I'm trying to do a bit more than that. While it feels like I'm physically unable to remove myself from the TV, I've at least gone halfway - I've moved my laptop from its spot on the table to my actual lap, & take up whatever duties I wish during commercials, which currently happens to be blogging.

Meanwhile, my phone was completely dicking me around. For some reason, none of my texts came through, & I had no idea anyone had even tried to get in touch with me until Nolan said he texted me hours ago. I ended up having about 15 messages come in at the same time, mostly just random tidbits from Terra, but a few happy Thanksgivings, one mysterious unknown number, & a tiny bit of drama, because apparently Bobby drunk texted Nolan last night. God help me.

What musical things are you the most thankful for?
Great songs, albums, & artists that make me very, very happy & often keep me sane, & that have been played obnoxiously & sung along to in the car, either alone or with my best friends. Concerts that allow me to see people who have strongly influenced & inspired me, both personally & hopefully as a writer & wannabe musician myself. Not to mention concerts that I've gone to with friends that have consequently given me some of the best memories & times of my life, even though some of those bands & friends alike aren't around anymore. Also, musicals themselves, because they're just so fun.

If you could say thanks to one artist/band who would it be and why?
I can't pick just one. So, I'll name the ones that most come to mind.
1. Anberlin, for being one of the above bands that has made me extremely happy & kept me sane, & helped me when things got rough. Plus, every single Anberlin show I went to was with Stephanie & Ian, & I've met Stephen Christian twice. There's a good story involving an Anberlin show & a pizza parlor that Brandon & I still laugh about. Slightly unrelated, but Stephen's amazing blog & humanitarian work as well.
2. Sufjan Stevens, for introducing me to music that's mellow & fun, & for occasionally getting religious, however subtly.
3. Josh Groban, for his stellar Christmas album that will probably end up on heavy rotation throughout December.
4. Mika, for making the best pop music in the world & cheering me up significantly when I'm down.
5. Punchline for being Punchline. How else can I put it?
6. The Cure for being so epic & amazing & getting me into important music at a pretty young age.

I spent most of yesterday, when I wasn't in class, packing & cleaning to come home for break. It's only five days, but I still took the opportunity to bring home some summer clothes & other things that are just taking up space, plus whatever I think I'll need for five days I don't have here.

I kicked off break partly by being lazy, & partly by giving the dogs baths, which is always interesting. Duke just looks a bit petrified & confused, & Dandy tries to make a run for it & then jumps on anyone & clings to their legs with his little paws. But they're both nice & clean now for Thanksgiving. So soft & pretty smelling!

I also slept for a good 10-11 hours last night. Good Lord. In my defense, Saturday I was drunk & only slept a few hours, caught up a bit on that Sunday night, but then was up later than usual Monday night & had to get up for class. I needed to get caught up. And Dandy was so thrilled that I was home & he got to stay upstairs that he was all over me & slept right against me the whole time.

In the meantime, I've done almost all the laundry in the house, & would like to try to get a lot of homework done. I have to. Two papers due when I get back & English due online Saturday night, as usual. The only exception I'll make is tomorrow. My plans are as such: sleep, get ready to eat, eat, watch House all day. Optional nap in between & optional House in the beginning. Morning House depends on when the marathon starts, when I wake up, & when I start getting ready for Grandma to come over.

It won't fill the Life on Mars void, though.

So a simple question Terra asked me this evening reminded me that I was drunkenly talking about how much I love Keane Saturday night, which is a bit ironic, given Tom Chaplin's stint in rehab. I also remembered trying to pry secrets out of a drunken Stephanie, but didn't pursue it any further when it became obvious that she was on to my trickery.

A friend of Tessa's added me on Facebook & messaged me tonight, admitting to creeping - honesty I appreciate, & boldness I envy. He seems nice, fun, & cool enough, & according to Tessa, he is - as a friend. Otherwise, he's a bit of a man whore, so in a way I'm to consider myself warned. The general consensus is, though, to just talk to him & see how it goes. There's no real harm in that, & I have nothing else going on for me right now, though I must admit I do question his motives a bit. I can't even creep sufficiently, like he obviously did, because Facebook/my internet are dicking me around. Which is hopefully not foreshadowing further dicking around. It is flattering, though, to know there's some sort of interest there.

It's funny that we were just discussing all of this, too, the other night. And the fact that Tessa didn't intentionally send him my way is a bit of a relief, too.

I'm looking for someone to date, but not a meaningless fuck. There was some meaningless kissing with Steven three years ago & while it wasn't a big deal to either of us, I still know he's done the same thing with other girls & had before then. I'm not hurt by it, but it does slightly change your opinion of a person slightly. And you boys wonder why we girls think all you guys want is sex. It's because we're surrounded by far too many who obviously do, & that'll sour opinions quickly.

So, thoughts & advice?

I also have this little hunch that a friend of Brandon's may have a crush on me. It wouldn't be the first time - Nick apparently liked me a few years back, though I hated him at the time. This kid, however, I get along with & actually talk to. And I have to hand it to Nick - he's much more tolerable than he used to be. He went about his crush entirely the wrong way. I've done a little prying with Brandon, sort of beating around the bush, but either knows nothing or is sworn to secrecy. Must be awkward to know at least one friend of yours had a crush on your older sister at a point.

Then there's the random creeper who propositioned me for web came sex last week. I blocked his ass so fast.

What is going on?